The Church of the Messy

I have been pondering this past year, its goals and successes, failures and necessary changes. I'm constantly surprised at all that the Lord does behind the scenes of what I see. I mean, I am that arrogant. So arrogant as to believe that nothing really happens in people's lives unless I guide them and show them and reveal things to them. Oh, Come quickly Lord Jesus, for your preachers are prone to arrogance and presumption!

I'm reminded of my propensity to pride as I saw two of my sisters this week struggling to understand one another. One of my goals for this year was become more transparent, to be quick to repent and lose my power. And I lauded it as a goal for the church, too. And here I was seeing the Lord working out Spirit-led transparent community between these two women.

As they struggled to be understood, each desiring so badly for both to see Jesus and to honor His Word, I saw the messiness amidst the struggle. And it hit me amidst all the emotion. The severity of growth is only accomplished in the messiness of other-centered transparency, of letting oneself be vulnerable and open to criticism and painful response. Each of my sisters were wrapped up in this struggle to know and be known, to wrestle with the Lord over what His Word actually teaches. Coinciding with each move toward understanding came the counter-reaction of hurt feelings and wounded fear. Not fear of the struggle, but fear of losing each one another in the struggle. Fear of rejection and the bruising of the soul. And they humbly and openly pressed on, spurning their egos their love for each other was evident. And the incredible outcome of these two amazing women's struggle was a deepened love for each other and a new sense of togetherness that did not exist before. I saw God bringing all things together under Jesus as He brought these women together soul to soul.

So, it was I who needed again to be taught this week. And I was taught, not through my books or articles, but through the messy proclamation of these two sisters. Authentic struggle with the Lord and the humbly honest seeing of Jesus together results is messy but glorious growth.

And I have to ask myself: Am I willing to get messy? Am I willing to reveal my deepest vulnerability and be weak? Am I becoming like a child, a messy, unconcerned about how I appear to the adults, child? I would like to think that I could handle this seeking of Jesus in a similar manner and come out of the hunt with a deeper love for my brothers and sisters, a greater sense of comaraderie, and a higher vision of God's glory in my relationships.

Lord, I want a messy life, one of deep growth and severe love. I want it for your people, too. Make us a messy church, one of brokenness, humility, honesty and a perseverent pursuit of love for each other and above all, of You. Make us a church of the messy, that our deepened love for and understanding of each other would glorify You and You alone.

Soli Deo Gloria
To the Glory of God Alone,

Richard